Sunsetting CBD
Over the past half a year or so, I've been experimenting with CBD for improving sleep.
The way CBD works on me is a bit different than melatonin, the effect seems to be more in sleep maintenance, rather than just falling asleep. I have trouble with sleep maintenance if I:
1) Did not expose myself to narrative content (animation, TV shows, manga, personal adventures) during the day, and: 2) Did not do at least one short intense burst of cardio the day before
CBD straight up removes the need for both of these for me, and I usually have no trouble sleeping through the entire night. This saves about 45 minutes a day, which is really huge.
As another benefit, I feel like I passive enjoy music more in the past few months, and I think CBD might have had an ambient effect on this. I listen to music a lot, and the passive affect bonus this gives is pretty significant.
However, I think there are issues with continuous usage. Recently I've been decreasing my doses of CBD, and despite this I'm feeling several side-effects (with very, very slow onset over the course of a month or two):
– Increase in brain fog
– Worse sense of time
– More easily distracted
– Less inclination to follow routines
One of the things I enjoy the most is quiet thinking time when I can organize the events of the past few days & weeks; the brain fog makes it harder to do this. The distraction & routine hit is also something I believe will culminate to longer than 45 mins per day of penalty. This would be the case even if those 45 minutes were completely wasted, which I believe cardio and watching shows are actually very-much non-wasted time.
The above makes a pretty convincing statement that I should stop CBD, though one of the effects that I might be the saddest to let go is exactly how much I've enjoyed music on it.
I think CBD basically amplifies music for me, and I had a recent peak experience with music where I was moved to tears and felt personally transformed by a track, I think CBD probably did help facilitate it. Nowadays most of the music I listen to are quite positive and prosocial, so I think the amplified affects are very positive and prosocial.
It's ironic, but I do find my appreciation of music sometimes to counter my productivity. Like I'd work and get distracted by a song that hits particularly hard, or I'll have days where I feel compelled to just listen to music and bask in the vibes instead of doing whatever intellectual work. Those are some of the most fun moments for me, there does need to be a balance though.
In The Birth of Tragedy Nietzsche outlined Apollonian aesthetics and Dionysian aesthetics, where the prior focused on rational, sharp-edged, elegant beauty whereas the latter focused on passionate, impressionistic, and melding beauty. I think about the difference between these two a lot, and believe that there should be a balance between the two types to continue to motivate both progress & enjoyment in life. What CBD offered me in the realm of music feels like watching a particularly striking sunset. It's great to be there in the moment and immerse yourself in its alluring beauty. But part of the value is that the sun will eventually set and we will find ourselves moving about, making progress on our dreams to build a more beautiful tomorrow.
— Categorized under: #psychology, #productivity